HI EVERYONE! Whew. This feels great – to be here writing to you again. I know that I’ve been MIA but I’m trying to make my comeback. I had to step away for a little for a few reasons but mainly because *drumroll please*
On July 12th a game of Heads Up turned into an incredibly surprising proposal around a small group of close friends and family. I was completely in shock and at first I didn’t even realize what was happening. He really got me so good and I’m so excited for this next chapter with my boo.
You can watch how it all went down here!
Shortly after the proposal, wedding planned commenced! We’ve have been real busy with getting the major details of our wedding squared away since the big day is in less than a year!
Aside from planning, I really just needed some extra time to myself. Uh why? Well, my fiancé plays basketball professionally overseas and in the beginning of September he went back to Europe for the upcoming season. I’m pretty used to him leaving and being away from home for at least 7-8 months but this time I was struggling a bit with his absence in the beginning.
Blessings During COVID-19
COVID-19 really came and shook 2020 up like a b*tch and so many of us experienced loss because of it. In the same breath, we also witnessed silver linings and blessings amidst the pandemic. On average, my fiancé is home for 4 months during the off-season, which is during summer, but since this past season ended abruptly due to the coronavirus, he came home early. Although he wasn’t playing basketball for a while, he was home with me for more than 6 months! That’s the longest we’ve been home together since 2016. *gasp*
During his off-season pre-covid, we spent most of the day apart anyways seeing that I had to go to my 9-5 during the week and he would workout at nights. Yet, this time was different. I was working remote and got to spend ALL day in quarantine with him. Literally, ALL DAY just him and I. We loved every single moment. We embraced it all because this much time together was very uncommon with our professions.
Even with the ups and downs we experienced during the pandemic, we practiced gratitude. We acknowledged our blessings and didn’t take this time together for granted.
The Transition Back
With all that said, can you imagine how difficult it was for me to transition back to being alone once he left. I got so comfortable with him being home and being in the same space together. As I was living in the moment, I *almost* forgot that he would have to go back overseas. Emotionally & mentally I was not as prepared as I would’ve hoped.
September was tough. Even though I was so happy he got to go play again, I was still a little upset. To add to that, work got insanely busy all at once and then our family received not so good news. It was a challenge to process all my thoughts and emotions adequately. No matter what was happening, life still was moving and I had to power through.
With all on my mind, I felt powerless and incapable of returning to the blog. My self-doubt ate at me and I didn’t think I could return successfully. I decided to take more time away and wait till I felt comfortable balancing everything life threw at me.
Even though it all was challenging, it allowed me to continue growing on this journey. Let me share some of my takeaways from the month of September with you below.
Focus on what you can control
Let’s face it. Sh*t happens. We can’t control everything and the obsession thinking we can will do more harm than good. Plenty of times I had to remind myself that some things were out of my hands and I had to let it go. It wasn’t easy but it was necessary because I would’ve wasted what little energy I had on something I couldn’t change.
It’s important to practice shifting your focus on the things you have control over and how you react to things. Watch how much a difference that makes in your day-to-day life.
One day at a time (tomorrow is a new day)
Okay, so today was a bad day. Maybe horrible. But you know what, tomorrow is a new day. A fresh start. This was my daily reminder in September. Some days felt unbearable but I reminded myself it was temporary. I knew that tomorrow would bring new opportunities, even if I still felt a little crappy. Doesn’t mean things won’t get better in the end.
I believe when we look too far into the future we lose focus on what’s in front of us. If we know our problems won’t get resolved in 24 hours, shouldn’t we try to be present in the moment? Take the time to focus on what you can control and tackle what’s in your sight.
Reminder: Do the best you can today and start fresh tomorrow. Take things one day at a time.
Continue to have faith even when you don’t see change
This is the most important one! God is always working behind the scenes for us, even when we don’t feel it. Just because we don’t see change right away either doesn’t mean it’s not happening.
On your journey there will be moments when you may feel exhausted, hopeless, and may want to give up. You’ve been working so hard for a breakthrough and you just don’t see things improving. But it’s in those moments when we gotta keep going and keep believing. God is working on your prayers. If you continue to hold on, you’ll see everything work out – sometimes better than what you’ve imagined.
As mentioned in my last blog, my faith plays a vital role in my mental health journey. When I’m having a tough time, reading scriptures, praying and listening to Gospel music helps me a lot. I’m reminded that no matter what I’m going through or feeling, God is there to strengthen me, remove my burdens and help me through it all.
There you have it! That basically sums up what I’ve been up to since my last post! As I make my way back, please don’t hesitate to reach out to say hi! I hope that August & September treated you well. Wishing you happiness, new opportunities, and prosperity this October!